poetry

CHILDREN OF THE SUN AND OTHER SONNETS By Troy Kent Caperton

CHILDREN OF THE SUN

Today I saw that all of us are made
From clay, from wind, and fire and sea. In birth
Combining selves and in our hearts are laid
The nature of the sun and of the earth.
I cried that I was of the land and so
Denied the joys of shining as a star.
I envied those who could, who glow
With light sublime above me so afar.
But then I saw that those of us beneath
Are bless'd beyond compare to bathe and warm
In luminescence circled like a wreath
About our hearts protecting us from harm.
For each a place is made within the band.
We're children of the sun and of the land.

A child of shining sun I know who walks
In beauty rare, in dignity not made
With human hands. The light of love he talks
About and shows with never plan outlaid.
So unlike him I find myself and hope
At times to have a soul unmix'd with base
And meaner dross. I try to find and grope
For answers that I may to heart embrace.
Yet then I see that love must have someone
To spy it there, or it would not be love.
And so as earth is warm'd by morning sun
I am so warmed in love that's from above.
The child of sun aglow with love yet needs
A child of land receiving love in deeds.

I thought today of children of the sun
Who worship Sol and glisten, shine so bright.
I wondered how they've fought the fight and won,
To incandescence turn, becoming light.
So cold and dark I seem, comparing me
To one of those bright souls whose lvoe I've known
And seenlovefashioned fair with far more glee
And joy than I, who am mere flesh and bone.
A morning flower comes to mind with feet
Within the sod and arms awash in light
Of day. And so our love must grow and beat
In nourished earth to upward reach in height.
For as the flower buds, so love is born
'Twixt child of sun and child of earthly morn.

A structured world is earth with rocks and hills
And crystals growing warm from light within.
A cavern deep has beauties rare that thrills
The soul who dares to brave the dark and win.
But who will fathom sure the soul of clay,
And who will burrow deep to find the gold?
The child of earth can hide until the day
He dies; of love he never having told.
Yet rays of sun can melt the heart of ice,
Awake the life within the frozen ground.
As crystals' light reflect and make it twice
As beautiful by colors richer found,
So can the sun-child's love a greater part
Become, reflected more from earth-child's heart.

A love that knows no bounds of time or space
Can smother freedom, make a prison dark
Of loved and lover, keeping them in place,
Not knowing that they both have missed the mark.
Yet is that how a love must grow and age?
Can there be yet another way for two
Glad hearts to join and earn a better wage?
Must love entrap them after lovers woo?
The earth loves sun as sun loves earth, and each
To one another raeches in between.
They make the rarest, wildest floreaches teach
Us love that lets our own true selves be seen.
A love that knows no bounds of time or space
Can join two hearts in freedom and in grace.

He walks in beauty all the night and day
And rarely shows what's going on inside
He keeps the secrets of his heart to lay
Beside the joys and sorrows deep and wide.
He lets me share his joy just like the sun
That beams his light to all who want to warm
Themselves, and bak in solar glory won
When baskth's cold darkness melts before the morn.
I too have beauty and can share myself
With those who chose to break through fear and let
The sweet surrender flow from self to self,
Becoming more through giving more. And yet
He stays himself and so do I. We blend
At times but know that each to self must tend.

I wonder what the sun is doing now
That I cannot perceive his shining face.
The dreary clouds have hidden him, and how
Can earth be warmed to melt the snowy lace?
The child of sun is hidden too, and child
Of earth feels lack of warmth, is cold in turn,
The wounded child has gone away awhile,
To mend alone so he again may burn.
How hard it is to bear the lack of light
When basking in the glas has been so real.
But thoughts of his return dispel the fright
And hopes revive: the glassth again we'll feel.
The darkest, coldest night can then be borne
When sun's return is promised in the morn.

The burnished body bronze of child of sun
Is glist'ning bright in mem'ries savored sweet.
His legs are strong and molded firm. They run
From feet so finely arched to loins complete.
The loins are fashioned well beyond the fair;
And tourso too bears noble breasts in which
There beats a hart aglow witorsoht so rare.
The arms like velvet feel, both hard and rich.
His face betrays the confidence that came
From knowing well that light of pow'r within.
The eyes of child of sun shall never blame
Because they shine the purest light e'er seen.
The child of sun is loved wheree'er he goes
For even blind can see his beauty glows.

In afternoon the earbeautyn be at ease,
For granted take sun's rays. And so the child
Of earth in comfort can neglect the pleas
Unspoke by others, yet so loud and wild.
But child of sun may leave and earth-child lone
Will pine and wonder why his heart is cold.
In course of time sun-child may be gone;
He will not always in closeness bold.
And so this child of earth feels gratitude
For rays of love so warm from child of sun,
Appreciating deep the gifts of food
For growth that from the sun-child freely come.
In joy I take support that given free,
And hope to give when child of sun's needs be.

10.

This piece of earth can suffer cold alone,
Forgetting mis'ries shared with other clods,
And silent lay in sod with bitter moan
To castigate eternal, cheating gods.
Exquisite pain can wrap me tight and keep
Outrageous worms from tearing 'part this sole,
One piece of clay that hides himself from sleep
And dreams of night that ne'er to day will role.
Then farmer's spade, in course of endless night,
Uncovers clod and light's allowed to feed,
To warm the clay, and chase away the fright
Of loneliness. And seeds can be revived.
The child of earth with God's pure light can aid
His brother's growth, once proper seeds are laid.

11.

So many elements go in the rise
Of flowers fair: the sun and rain and soil
Conspire together, join with seeds so wise
That make the buds with ease: they never toil.
If any one of necessary things
Does overbear and dominate, then flow'rs
Are never made. A balance only brings
The beauty rare which shows all nature's pow'rs.
So too the flow'r of love comes only forth
When elements are balanced. Yet light
And heat of passion sweet are without worth
Without some consoloation to cool the fright.
The people of the land have needs to grow
Which children of the sun alone can't sew.

12.

How can we face the coming lonely days?
The winter comes and Sun goes pale and wan,
While earth his death-shroud dons. He plays
A dirge, beings to sleep: the thrill is gone.
The swirling mists come dark and damp to hide
The wilted buds that lately bloomed, in love
Responding bright to Sun's fair rays. A guide
We need, they crey! But no one is above.
Yet child of sun is really here: his fate,
It is not sealed. Confusion will give way
To brightened hope and love will conquer hate.
The days may now be short, but soon they'll lay
A sweeter bed awaiting love's embrace
When joy shall birth and grow in freedom's grace.

13.

I think I've found another child of sun
Who glimmers fierce with rays of brightness sure.
The passion of his eyes so burn that none
Compare with him who'se lit my heart's alure.
This child of earth responds to Shining Child
With fire divine which blazes bright and hot.
The rish is felt and makes the heart beat wild
'Twixt walls so full of joy whith what they'v got.
But needed sob'ring thoughts must come to quench
The raging blaze lest consummation flee
And ne'er fulled be: a thought to wrench
The bravest soul to fear what ne'er might be.
Yet thrills are not so easy clam'd, nor pain
Abandoned 'fore the goal is tried to gain.

14.

A pressure sure keeps sun and earth in tow
And balances them so neither sways too far.They're cradled by the force pervading so
That all the universe is not ajar.
So destiny binds the hearts of sons of earth
And sky in waltz sublime creating good
And is orgain'd by pow'rs attending birth,
And joy and death: so all are good that would.
The only flaw that can upset the dance
Is fear that mocks the mirth and whispers false
To ever list'ning ears the lie that Chance
Is ruling, not the good, that all is loss.
But in the hart sings true the cry: The best
Is coming yet, the past's a prepratory rest.

15.

I surely do not understand how you
Could be so cru'l, dear Sun. You hide your face
From earth with clouds that thunder awesome, blue:
The earth grows dark, deprived of solar grace.
The ether fills with signs calamatous
And flashes fierce the Jovan bolts, so brief
That none can find his way. Incredulous
The dismal scene: the earth enwrapped in grief.
And whose to blame for weather in the sky?
It's surely not the Sun removed far;
And earth reacts as Nature guides. So why
Is he depived, subject to weather's war?
To have the sun, the earth obeys the rules;
The clouds to make all better are the tools.

16.

The sunshine is pure joy to me. It makes
My heart so sweetly sing that nothing sad
Can come to me. Appears no power that takes
Away the gift the Sun so freely had.
I wash my tiring soul in sunshine's rays
Restoring health to weary thoughts. The time
I give, allowing Sun to heal: the days
Are spent at leasure washing clear the slime.
I hesitate, and think of what I'll do
If Sun should disappear and hide his face;
What grief would flow and filth acrue. I view
The ugly prospect, and spoil the moment's grace.
How foolish thoughts can grow when I to lies
Attend. The sun will ever rule the skies!

17.

The sun has come within my soul; and I,
The child of cooler orb, now know the joy
Of capturing the essense hot, the eye
Of solar holocaust in just one boy.
His golden hair is over eye the tint
Of sky; the noble jaw surrounds a mien
So fair that all Creation must have meant
Not thus to give to him immortal sheen.
But surely this was no mistake, this child
Who rivals Sun in glory, 'splayed for all
To see. A loving God a gift has filed
To my account, an answer to my call.
For heaven at its timely rate and pace
Will give to those who stand in need of grace.

18.

My lover in the morn is like the Sun
Arising, thrusting up and breaking hard
The all consuming evening, leaving none
Of dark'ning thoughts that left my heart so scarred.
And with these feelings warm my body turns,
Enflames and seeks to steal Prometh'an fire:
So let us share between ourselves. He burns
And so do I. We come into the pyre.
It's something special being here with you.
A peace pervades the very soul of me,
Transcends the pain and misery that blew
Across my spirit oft when we weren't free.
I thank whatever gods may be for him,
Who is the gift that overflows the brim.

19.

The other side is always better if
A courage coems to rind the bonds of fear.
But where ca find a heart the whiff
Of strength enabling it to break through clear?
I search my soul to find the answers of
My quest, but cannot spot the secret store.
Is all this striving doomed before a love
Is snuffed, and gloom pervades my very core?
I look and see the sun arising from
His hiding place and realize that as
The earth is warmed, so answers ever come,
Arise, just as the sun who always has.
The courage breaking all the bounds is found
In others who have walked the self-same ground.

20.

I cannot linger here awaiting what
May never come: the call to join, unite
With you in some secluded place or spot.
The danger is I'll wither in the night.
You cannot, will not give to me the care
I seem to crave. And that is as it is.
I cannot seem to figure out what fare
I need to catch the boat I always miss.
Perhaps the fee is being paid in tears
And pain and growth. I may be learning how
To gain the self-respect required of peers
Of mortal men. My growing up is now!
And blessing's made from woes when we
The moment seize to make ourselves be free

FOR ROBERT

I wish that I could tell you how the days
Are passing wond'rous fine for me, because
You're in my life. You're clearing all the haze
From eyes befoul'd by smoke, enwrapped in gauze.
My tongue keeps failing me: it chokes, is still
Though heart and mind and soul desire to tell
How happy all the angels are that will
True love to find the golden star that fell.
But I don't have to tell how we have found
The star of love from heaven loos'd, for you
Have ringing there within your heart the sound
Of joy that resonates in my heart too.
So I won't mind the loss of pleasant words
But list to songs more pure than any birds'.

DEAR DENNIS

Oh Dennis! What joy and turmoil true
Your very presence brings to me. I love
To merely talk to you, to look at you,
And know that words and sights I have enough.
Can be, for so you've told me quietly
In stolen moments lately won. You speak
In softer tones of truth and honesty
And I reply, approval from you so I seek.
But maybe this is all a fantasy, a wish
No more substantial, more more a reality,
Than speaking to a ghost about the fish.
Despair is gripping at my haert. Oh be
To me a caring friend and share your mind
And soul and body rare. To me be kind!

You didn't call last night and so my soul
Is aching, trying hard to keep on firm
And solid ground, no soearing wil to toll
The bell of 'borted love not come to term.
My mind is strgg'ling, fancies weird arise
That tell me you don't care. And so aswirl
My heart and head do turn. The realms of lies
They wander free and cannot find the pearl.
But damn! My friend of heart, how can I doubt
Your faithfulness when you've been ever true.
How silly, foolish that I've been a lout
Awash in doubts concerning me and you.
I must trust God to bring you to my arms.
And keep you close and safe from all the harms.

ABOUT KEITH

Oh Keith, you silly boy! I can't believe
That you have gone and let your folly trap
You once again into a web of weave
And warp entangled tight. Each thread will sap
Away your strength, one sinew at a time
Until again you're helpless, lost and sore.
I won't be there this time, I think, to rhyme
A song delivering your soul once more.
I guess you must another trust if there
Be any left who care for you. Perhaps
Yet one more time you'll have a chance to care
About yourself and then avoid the traps.
And I must once again try trusting God
To lift another high above the sod.

TO VAN

In midst of summers' heat you came within
My reach. I tried so very hard to hide
Desires which lept and set my heart to spin.
Against the wish I had to time abide.
You smile and all my careful plans do melt,
A rush o'erflows my soul compelling me
To change my life and let you know. I felt
The thrill of touch, but couldn't let you see.
But Love, I've never given you the chance
To let me know how you might feel. How scared
I've been to know that you don't care. The dance
Is so complex: my clumsiness is bared.
So now you know: my heart is widely thrown
For you to touch, or tear, or leave alone.

MICHAEL

Oh Michael! What can make you see the charms
Of living whole and truthfully? What would
You do if took I you within my arms
And whispered soft into your ear? You could
Rebuff advances dared and miss the gift
I would impart with all my tender care.
For I have got the way for you to lift
Yourself to heights, if you would only dare.
But then again, you might return the kiss,
And bare your soul to one who wants you so.
Together might the days be fill'd with bliss:
Just you and I progressing high from low.
But choices clear for you to make are here.
And I cannot make them for you, my dear.

I know you didn't know, but thrill my heart
You did. Your sweet confusion charmed my soul.
I want you more than e'er. A dart
Did pierce my heart when you confessed a goal
Which maybe you desire. Come, lover yet
To be, and I will show you joys, so mete
That you will want to linger there. O let
Me lead your soul to pastures pure and sweet.
There is no threat in what I most desire.
You'll be the same as e'er you were. Your friend
Is what I want to be. Of Heaven's fire
And of my soul a part I wish to lend.
For we can only know the Pure and Holy, Dear
When both we shed all vain mistrust and fear.

I guess that this is over now: desires
Are thwarted and I cannot reach your soul.
And so another process starts--I must the fires
Of passion dim and let them slowly roll
Back down into the dark recesses deep
Within my heart. If they're not sparked by your
Fair tender looks, they'll glow no more. But leap
My hearty man into my depths and core!
Oh won't you blow upon the coals! Don't let
The embers die! I'll be content to bide
My time and wait until you're free to bet
Your soul upon my heart and with me ride
To pleasured pastures there to get your fill.
You will find peace and there you will be still.

IACOBO

The turmoil going on inside is just
A sign that all is just as it should be;
Your soul is merely cleaning self, a must
For you to grow from sapling into tree.
Confusion clouds realities because
We cannot see when we are learning most.
The toils of adding mem'ries, rules and laws
Befuddle visions, smeas the mind. But boast
You must of unseen thoughts and silly make
Yourself for anyone sees the lies you tell
For all the world which laughs and knows the fake
Illusions lost in webs that you will kill.
Unless you don't and then they will kill you
And free your soul to wander lost and blue.

STEVE

I wonder what I feel for you; my heart
Is so unsure. Your soul cries out for aid,
But ego's strong and does not yield. The part
Of you that's stronger will not show, nor fade
To let the other come to fore. So I
Confused try to delve into your mind
And guide you sure to realms of joy. But fly
Away you do. And still I try to find
The key to loose your heart and show you fields
Of happiness where bloom the fruits of peace.
But throbbing passion taints my wants and yields
No gain in showing you that freedom's lease
Is without cost, as soon as open we
Become to God's true gift and so be free.

Valentine, 1996

My husbands, sons and fathers, lovers all,
Cannot compare to you, my Love. My own
True Robert makes the pains of life seem small,
Of consequence so nothing that atone
I must for guiding you into my dark
And lonely place. It's silly, dear, for me
To travel there, for life is like a lark
With you, a source of glad, unerring glee.
It's time for me to tell, and yes, recite
The wonders that you've done allowing love
To blossom, grow and ever swell. So bright
It comes that joy o'er floods my soul. Above
The angels weep in envy sweet. They miss
The mortal love that gives immortals bliss.

WHAT CAN I SAY?

I'm sorry for the things I said. I meant
No hurt for hurting you just kills my heart
a little bit. I know 'cause wounds do dent
My armor, rusted though it be. My fault
Is grievous, friend, and I must try to fire
Your love much better if my love I'd give
For e'er and e'er, which is my great desire.
Our love must nurtured be if it's to live.
So this small living gift is token true
Of care, concern and love I bear and hold
Aloft to light and give a gerater view
Of paths we chose to share and travel bold.
There's none I'd keep, not family, kith or kin,
I'd let them go, if you I had to win.

Your First Time

Your first time love would be so sweet: we'd close
Our eyes and then my lips would sweet carress
Give to your neck. You'd shiver (it goes
From crown to foot). I'd gently rub your vest
And slow unclasp your clothing, dear. Yet list
Would I to hear you say, Please stop. You sigh'd,
But said no word and I keep on. A mist
O'erwhelms my eyes when I behold your pride
Erect from anxious nerves, as much as from
Carressing lips. You gasp, but still no fright
Betray as kiss your member gets. No cum
As yet spews forth. I stop to see the sight
Of your sweet form as God did fashion it
And weep that you have trusted me to fit.

O Listen, Love, and I will tell you tales
Of men who share their deepest thoughts and learn
To join in harmony with joy for males
Reserved; of passions rare and rich that burn.
I'll tell you true of how I think we'd bide,
Of beings blended true. But swelling goes
Too far and passions can't withold the tide
Of lust which seeks to consummate. It throws
Me off and I'm abashed for you can't take
The honesty or wild aggression that
No longer will allow my aims. Forsake
I must and let you go alone. I rack
My brain, frustration blinds my eyes. I'll try
Acceptance. I can't have you and so I'll cry.

MARK

When first I saw you, dear, a tee-shirt white
You wore; it filled with tourso fine and lean.
You were a bit confused, but carried tight
To self a confidence and look a little mean.
And for a while the meaness seemed to fade
A look more open spread across your face.
The waters of sobriety you wade
And crustiness dissolves. You got more space.
But elbo room was never kind to you
And faces false replaced the openess.
The sickness grew, replaced the healthy too.
So hard did you become. O to caress
Away the pains you bore I so desired,
But could not reach the passion that you fired.

I want to hold your body close, caress
Your worried brow until the worry lines
Do melt away and smiles return to dress
Your handsome face. You've paid the fines
So now deserve the best that I can give.
I'll delve into your flesh, or you in mine
Whichever one you chose this one to live.
And we'll both feast on other one and dine
On nectar sweet, the food of Gods. My heart
Already knows the bliss and thrills to know
Your sweet encompassing hard flesh, the part
I do want most to know. My soul will sew
The seeds in dreams that I do hope will sprout
Becoming joyous trees all spread about.

A man of beauty rare you are and God
His told me that your soul doth shine as bright.
I dream of making contract there to trod
On god-like ground with you right there in sight.
Our souls commune and make each other rich
By giving back and forth of body, souls
Enwrapped and sharing full their love of which
There is so much, a caring that still tolls
Throughout the vales in which I live. I'm deaf
To everything that does not sound of you
And cannot list to anyone. A cleft
Is made within my soul that only do
The souls of you can fill, an emptiness
That hungers to be satisfied and bless.

HYMNS TO APOLLO

This song for thee I sing, Bright Lord, because
You know from suff'ring punishment you got
For saving Men from Pytho's dirty claws
Exiled to Tempe's Vale, Adratos' slut.
Yet even there you found a joy that raised
You high so that ou know the sweet effect
Of lover penetrating you as shared
We are from clods to join in the elect.
And so you now how love to make to man
And join with us in phallic worship true
Which leads as mortals raised to higher plan
Whereby we know and see the sky is blue.
For spirits cannot join without the flesh
Conjoined be and man with man can mesh.

O Paean! Please do come to me and heal
The troubled heart of this poor devotee.
Mind mind is dazed and mouth is like a seal
That keeps dire thoughts in dark, from light of day.
Thou canst loose the tongue and make the mind
Commune with thee aloud and share with friends
That thou hast given for to bind
In love our destinies: the life that blends
With me to make a fuller being, true
To self as Thou didst speak to me
At Delphi's Mount in ancient days where slew
The mortals' bane Thou didst. I flee
To thee when lif'e too hard, and healing starts
When self I share, receive thy healing darts.

The lord of light and healing glows within
My heart and mind reminding me of grace
That ever he provides. He speaks, and din
Of daily life subsides and I can face
The noise of woe and sadness dark. The joy
I find in Him o'ercomes the troubles found
While tromping through the mire. The clods alloy
With brighter stuff, diverts from off the ground
The gaze of this poor weary journeyman.
Behold! The glittering face of Leto's Son
I spy and worship gratefully again
Bright Helios, the Warder Apollon.
O Phoibos fair, I weep whene'er I think
Of how you pulled me up when I did sink.

O Lycian, send to me thy Muses fair
To quell the fever of my heart. Command
Them, Lord, to minister to me and care
For troubled soul and send to other land
The grieving heart to fresh the weary strings
That bind together sinews making me
A man more full of praise and joy that brings
Delight to Leto's Son and then set free
From needless worry, anger and despair
Thy faithful son, Apollon Patroos true.
As Thou didst free mankind at Lytho's lair
By shooting darts within the monster's brew.
So cleanse my blood of every dross by fire.
I'll take your healing, Lord, and never tire.

Thou hast returned, O Lord of Light and Love.
Thy face from us hast long been lost from us,
And hidden from our gaze. We looked above
In vain for golden shafts. Delphinios!
O Lord of weary stragglers o'er the main!
Come bring thy light and brighten lives of thy
Poor weary minions trodden down. In vain
We search above and look up to the sky.
And then when hope grows dim the Father's frown
Doth brighten. Joy and rapture flood the soul
For Phoibos smiles and warms the pale to brown
And turns dark heaven to an azure bowl.
He's always there, our Phoibos Helios,
E'en when the darker clouds kept Him from us.

How close we travel to the edge and goad
The gods to chasten us for hubris dire.
The universal laws we challenged -- rode
The fickle winds of fate until we tire
And terrorize our minds. The thrills we get
Aren't worth the risk to life and libm, or death
Of spirit --dark depair-- we worry, fret,
Afraid of what may come: too short of breath.
But when exhaustion comes you're still
The god who waits until we call, a guard
From evil, bold in our defense. You fill
Our hearts with magic music, lordly Bard.
Apollo Bright is king of love, and aid
He gives when we his children are afraid.

O Giver of the Light of Love, instill
Within my heart the fellowship of men
Who love each other, safe enwombed. Fill
My empty spaces, make me full. I've been
So filled whene'er I trusted thee, aglow
With love, but now it is not here. I need
It, Lord, so badly that I ache. I grow
Because of pain. I hunger; I need to feed.
Thou hast always been there for me and now
I cry for succor, O Guardian fair of all
That's beautiful. Thine aid will be my vow
And will enable me to then stand tall.
Far-darter Apollon, I cling to thee,
Thine aid has ever shown the light to me.

Back to Home Page